Slices of Life: The Art of Shopping

Written by Belmont Patch columnist Lisa Gibalerio.

Some women (and maybe men too) just know how to shop. The cliché “born to shop” comes to mind, but I believe that – like most clichés – this is inaccurate.  Shopping effectively is a skill, one that is honed and practiced. It is not innate; it requires training, time and persistence.

About twice a year, my girlfriend Robin and I meet for shopping and lunch at a mall that is about halfway between our homes.  Robin is enviable in many ways. She is smart, beautiful, savvy, fearless, an accomplished cook and, man, she is incredibly gifted in the art of shopping.

When Robin and I met recently at a TJ Maxx in Manchester, NH, she asked me – as we wandered over to the handbag section – if I had any plans to purchase a new purse. I told her that no, the one I had was fine. She informed me, very tenderly, that the purse I was carrying was in fact starting to fall apart. She gently pointed out multiple loose threads and sections near the zipper that were in tatters.

“Tell you what,” she said brightly.  

“Pick out a new purse and it will be my early Christmas and Birthday present for you.”  

As we grabbed a carriage, and began to look at the offerings, I had no idea what I was in for.

Following about 20 seconds of deliberation on my part, I selected a few bags and offered them to Robin for her input.

“Well,” she said. “This is a great color for autumn, opens widely, which is necessary for easy access, has a nice, light interior and good structure. But the straps are too short and the outside pocket is small.”

My education into purse selection had begun. Ever the conscientious student, I began to make mental notes on the criteria that Robin brought to bear: a color that pops (“It’s a matter of taste,” she offered, “but neutral colors are boring”), inner-purse accessibility, a light interior (so things inside show up), workable strap length, generous outside pockets (important for the quick stashing and finding of cell phone, keys, and ChapStick®) and, finally, structure (does it collapse too easily?).

Another ability Robin possessed, unlike me, pertained to the recognition of brand names. Occasionally I’d hear her murmuring “Oh, a Giani Bernini, nice.” Or, “Tignanello – now they make a great bag!” I began to become familiar with names like Fossil, Dooney and Bourke, Michael Kors and Steve Madden.

At one point, our cart was so filled with potential handbags, that another customer started rifling through it thinking that Robin worked for TJ Maxx and was unloading “new arrivals.”

About 45 minutes into the process, a sense of overwhelm had overtaken me. I felt keenly the desire to find a far-reaching corner of the store, somewhere away from the handbags, and crawl into the fetal position. Or even better, find a snack and a latte.  

Robin was sympathetic. “You’re overwhelmed,” she said. “Let’s pick the one you like best and then we can hit Macy’s and see if there’s a better one there! We can return this one later.”

I could not fathom starting this whole process over again at Macy’s. But that’s exactly what happened and where, I might add, I found the perfect purse for me.  In case you’re wondering, it’s my favorite shade of orange (amber-ish), has great outside pockets, awesome accessibility, adjustable straps and decent collapsibility.

“Wow,” I said to Robin. “You really get into purse shopping.”

“Yes,” she agreed. “You should see me tackle jewelry and shoes. These three are my favorite items to purchase – they don’t get too tight as I get older.”

I could see her point.  Even though, I told Robin, my rings have sadly become too tight since having had kids.

“No worries,” she joked, “we’ll go ring shopping next!”